I have been requested to blog about this topic many times but have been avoiding it for years and years. And the reason I have been avoiding it is that I have two types of friends: those who like to lament together about ageing, and those who say there is no such thing as ageing. And of course, it is mostly older women like myself, retired or not, but definitely far along the path of life.
As I was doing SilverSneakers advanced yoga this morning, the lovely teacher ended with a beautiful breathing exercise: she asked us to
- breathe out fear and breathe in courage
- breathe in confidence and breathe out self-doubt
- breathe out judgment and breathe in appreciation
- breathe out negativity and breathe in positivity
- and so on
So, I decided to have courage and start blogging on ageing and perhaps make a series of it. I will interview friends about it and blog more in the future. Ageing is a very natural and expected part of life for all human beings, but one that women love to talk about more than men. That is an interesting and perhaps universal fact!
At my interfaith and other NGO circles, which is mostly retired women, it is also a big topic of discussion, often with a negative and resigned tone. And then I have friends, like Salpi, who like to say that there is no such thing as ageing. It is along the same lines of what Norwegians say (Salpi’s husband is Norwegian) that there is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothing! So, translating that into ageing, we could say there is no such thing as ageing only bad habits/attitudes! I love this mindset as it emphasizes what is inside of us- our mindset- and not what is out there, like culture, or in our bodies (spirit and mind over body).
Ageing does carry baggage in a society that treasures youth and energy. Workplaces are continuously trying to avoid being sued for ageing, while practicing it quite cleverly. We women love it when someone says: “you don’t look like you are a grandmother!” Wow, that puts a smile on our face. I wonder if men say that to each other. I don’t know but am curious and will have to interview some men too!
In Eastern cultures, ageing carries many benefits, and brings extra clout in decision-making, which is interesting given that our brains may be weaker! It is part of the broader act of acceptance of what there is, rather than wishing for what there is not. Cultural practices such as touching the feet of elders (Hindu) or kissing the hands of elders (Turkic) remind all present that elders have a privileged role in the family.
I admire those who sail into ageing gracefully, and attack setbacks, like knee surgery or foot surgery, as a separate event from ageing. It is true that surgeries or diseases can happen at any stage in life, and we should thank God every day that we are upright and feeling well. So many don’t get to have that, and our job is to express compassion for them rather than feeling sorry for ourselves. Personally, I have had more Dr. visits in 2021 and now 2022 than I care for, but I continue to work on my mindset- with allowance for some moping episodes, followed by wild dancing around the house! So keep working on that mindset no matter what the challenge. Thank God for the challenge you have for it could be so much harder. To be continued!
Be First to Comment